On Being Loved
Isn't that what poetry is all about?
I used to travel the internet cities in order to peddle my wares and secure a little love for myself. Yes. I did. For over ten years I spent my time in various places, some great and some not so. Some were beautiful for a while and others became beautiful after I took the time to "foster" a few poets along the way. This is where it gets sticky in the world of message board (the "dreary") poetry. There are those who "poo poo" that sort of thing but what exactly are they doing? Ah, therein lays the stickiness of it all.
An experienced poet (regardless of how much poetry they have actually read or can recognize should it be the influence on another poet)....has a debt to pay to those who fostered their own growth. But, the poet cannot repay the master because the master necessarily is already, a master. So who to repay the debt to?
To the amateur.
How is this done? Is it done by blindly accepting everything the acolyte produces?
Or is that just a handy way to secure that which the poet seeks for themself be they master or prodigy or amateurish underling? The LOVE.
Absolutely and it is a rotten thing to do to another poet while simultaneously conditioning the acolyte that no one else will ever love them the way the master does. Just a really rotten practice if you ask me.
You've got to be the type of master poet that has the ability to "form" another poet the way you see fit, the way you ought to. And the poet can choose you or something else. It takes work however and most master poets are just too far above that and go instead for the cheap thrill of being the Loved Master to whom allegiance must be paid. It makes for alot of careless, witless and inane poetry.
It does no one any good. Including the master themself.
I don't usually share much about these things (or my randiness towards my husband). I only do so because I decided to visit a poetry message board again after having been kicked out of so many over the years for my brutal honesty, my cautious wit or my ability to master the art of:
Nit and Crit. There is nothing, absolutely NOTHING wrong with it. What is wrong with it is that the people who do it are more interested in the love they can get as opposed to the love they can give back. And those that can do it and do not need the love anymore (because they are masters), are selfish little misers.
*And wouldn't you like to know where it is I go. Heh.
9 comments:
Wow! What insight! Did you come to this on your own, or did you have help?
Did you write it to give love, or to get love?
Will you ever cease your shameless self-promoting and horn tooting?
Do you really, in your randy heart of heart, believes anyone truly gives a shit about you, your work or your religious fanaticisms?
Just curious.
Ah once again, the bravery of anonymous posters strikes again. Putting fear and humiliation into my heart.
Oh for crying out loud.
If you don't like me, this blog or anything else then do something else. Like apply for a legal name or hey..how about a Blogger account?
Now there's an idea.
I realize that "whoever" you are, you seem to think I am writing about you or someone you know.
In psychiatric terms we call that "transference" and "counter transference".
I suggest you get some focus, stop doing the drugs and realize the world isn't about you or anyone else you know.
For that matter, it isn't about me either and a good thing that is because if I were King, imagine what would happen!
Countless free poems and advice all over the world.
It would be simply horrible.
Oh and by the way "anonymous"...this is MY blog.
Hahahaha.
Get your own if you like. Doesn't cost much and you too can influence the world with your wide and expansive knowledge of theology, poetry and human nature.
Good luck with it and let me know where it is when you get it so that I don't make the mistake of visiting it.
Have a nice day Anon.
When you know the back story it is not too hard to guess whom anonymous might be. It is a bit of the emperor having no clothes. I stopped by the old stomping ground and see that they have to go and copy your comments off of a third blog - where they seem to be persona non grata - in an effort to keep things stirred up. It is so sad really. The rest of the world is engaged in real deeds and day to day tasks that have some meaning while they tilt at this old tired paper tiger. Give it up dudes - Get over it already!
Oh, you think?
What site did they copy my comments off of? I go to quite a few you know.
At this point it is totally unclear which person is doing it. Hopefully it isn't the creep who switched one of my photos for a photo of someone watching something (me). That reminds me of this nut case Israeli...over ten years ago now...that threatened to kidnap my kids. His name was Keith Rice. He sometimes used the name "Sami" as well as "Max Headroom" or "Alan Goldstein". That guy was so nuts that he decided I was some woman that he met on a rooftop in Colorado who had an Arab boyfriend (and she had red hair) and she had said something "antisemitic" to him. That mofo stalked me for YEARS hahaha. When it came to threatening the kids though I finally told Mel about it so that he would know where to find my political "analysis" and the other posts because I was really afraid that guy could do something crazy.
It was really weird because right after that, a guy showed up at our house in Riyadh and started "showing up" all the time unannounced. He came over one night right at dinner time and so I had no choice but to invite him to stay and during that, this guy tells us that we need to know about the "stuff" in his briefcase in case something "unusual" should happen to him (he was heading somewhere on a business trip he said). When he said that, both MEl and I looked at each other in that "what the hell" type of way. So he opened his briefcase to show us what was in there...nothing Radi. He had nothing in there that would indicate he was a target of some sort of conspiracy hahaha. He had stupid business plans or something.
So when he left that night I asked Mel..."Did you hear what he said?"
He said yeah...and I told him "Remember what I told you about 'if something happened to me'?"
And he said yeah. And I asked if he thought it was connected and Mel was very sure about it. He said yes.
Oh...it could be anyone at this point in time. I've angered alot of rotten souls on my journey you know. Most of them pro Zionist lackies but a few in the camp of ignorance as well.
How it is.
Thanks for making note of it though..you know how I feel about that sort of thing.
Heh. I just woke up from a good nap...I was dreaming that we were "on evacuation" again. For us it seems like the word "vacation" is now transposed with "evacuation" to be "evacation" hahaha. I was dreaming that I was really, really tired...like the way I showed up in Phoenix last summer. I was in the "refugee" center and trying to eat some food. There was a lot of food but I was just so tired I couldn't eat any of it. I kept putting some on my tray and then I'd misplace the tray because I couldn't concentrate well enough to feed myself.
Hahaha..and that's where it gets really funny because then I run into Senator Kerry who is also being "evacated" hahaha.
I think that is because he is openly admitting that Tower 7 was a "controlled demolition".
He's in our refugee camp now it seems.
Oh dear. Guess I'm a bit nervous about the trip to Lebanon. You think?
I'm not so much worried about the very high possibility of Israeli bombings but I guess I'm worried about the rest of it. You know...things there are still really terrible according to Tima..nothing has been fixed. Not really. Iran is paying to do some of the roads in the south. I have a feeling me and the Bijou aren't gonna be taking many walks either as there are still hundreds of thousands of "bomblets" in a village close by named Aita and Bint Jubail as you well know is just over the hill from us.
Oh well. There's always prosthetic legs you know. Think I'd look good in one? Heh, they used to call me "Peg a Leg Porter"....prophets. Damn.
[58.22] You shall not find a people who believe in Allah and the latter day befriending those who act in opposition to Allah and His Apostle, even though they were their (own) fathers, or their sons, or their brothers, or their kinsfolk; these are they into whose hearts He has impressed faith, and whom He has strengthened with an inspiration from Him: and He will cause them to enter gardens beneath which rivers flow, abiding therein; Allah is well-pleased with them and they are well-pleased with Him these are Allah's party: now surely the party of Allah are the successful ones.
Hmm. Yeah..that is the facts but certainly not the same anon who presented it. Thanks.
You know..I must admit I do check their site once in a while but apparently not often enough. I would have thought they'd find something better to do since they are all athiests and God Haters Radi. That much is obvious.
But I do check in once or twice a week to make sure the psychos over there aren't doing things like they did when Joe used Sarah's voice for his stupid "Ring Tones of Hell" bit. I was glad to find that and I must remind that particular poster who has a history of stalking primarily female poets (Tammy) that I still have a dime and I'm willing to spend it if need be. She is a very sick individual you know.
As for the others?
Well. Who cares really. They aren't really my business and if they prefer to discourage God Beliefs in each other then fine by me.
Paradise isn't for people who do not believe in it you know but I can assure you, hell is for everyone who doesn't and there is a fine discourse by one of the Twelve Imams in which a man asks the Imam for a bit of admonition.
So the Imam advises:
Go eat from something that Allah gave you and sin as you like. Go hide from Allah where he can't hear you and sin as you like. Then face the angel of death as he is about to take your soul and sin as you like. Finally, as you are being escorted into hell, refuse to go and sin as you like.
I think that best describes how I feel about those morons.
Do as you like. You aren't my friends nor were you ever my teachers. I was teaching them but they were too blind to recognize it.
Oh well. At least I tried and from what I've heard, I get points for doing that.
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